Choosing the less convenient delusion
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I am exactly as genuine and as deceitful as any person who doesn’t try particularly hard to be either. I suspect that most people strike that happy balance, whether they follow my approach or not. Those who think they are particularly deceitful often overestimate their skills at faking it (underestimating the perceptiveness of the people around them, who might just play along for the sake of politeness); those who think they are particularly genuine are often just particularly good at fooling themselves along with everyone else.
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Nobody rewards you for choosing despair over delusion. What’s more, it shows a lamentable lack of humility. Choosing despair over delusion presupposes that delusion is something that can be avoided. Which is a questionable idea, when in fact, the only choice you have, might be the one between more and less convenient forms of delusions. (If this is true, believing in your own undesirability for instance might actually be the more convenient delusion, as things are generally assumed to get messy as soon as desire enters the equation). Choosing the less convenient delusion could be its own reward.





